


How Does That Even Work?

by ugandadistrict9



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Multi, OR IS IT, Threesome - M/M/M, eh same thing, im so sorry, sinning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-05-24
Packaged: 2018-03-31 12:28:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3978028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ugandadistrict9/pseuds/ugandadistrict9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Elder Mckinley spends a little too much time in Elder Cunningham and Elder Price's room, the other Elders listen in to find out what exactly they're up to...</p>
            </blockquote>





	How Does That Even Work?

**Author's Note:**

> this is something me and my friend thought of a while ago and holy shit.... 
> 
> yeah im so sorry... my ships changed since I started reading mcpricely fic so now its an ot3

"Guys..." Cunningham said pensively. "Do you think it's possible to kiss with three people?"

  
Price gave him a weird look at the strange question. "I don't think so... Why?"

  
Cunningham pouted. "I wanted to kiss you guys, but both of you at the same time so that nobody would feel left out..."

  
"Aw, that's really sweet, Arnold." McKinley smiled.

  
"Yeah,” Price agreed. “He has a point though... There isn't too much stuff like that that's good for three people, is there..."

  
"I know, right! I mean I guess having three people in a relationship... it's not that normal, but..."

  
"Who cares?" Price made a clicking sound with his tongue. "I love you guys, and if I'm weird for dating you then fine. Good. I don't care if it's "weird,” or if “God doesn't approve of it.” Why should I care what some probably non-existent asshole thinks?”

  
"Yeah!!" Cunningham agreed. "I just wish there was like.. three-way couple stuff for us."

  
McKinley's face reddened a little as he seemed to be thinking of something.

  
Cunningham eyed him suspiciously. "What is it?"

  
"What's what?" he laughed nervously, fussing with the collar of his shirt.

  
"You know something..."

  
"N-no.."

  
"Connor."

  
McKinley sighed. "Okay, fine, I do... but.. it's embarrassing." he whined. "You guys w-wouldn't wanna do it anyways."

  
"That's not true." Cunningham assured. "Just tell us. Whatever it is, we'd never judge you."

  
McKinley shook his head.

  
"Aw, c'mon, Connor." Price encouraged, gently touching his shoulder.

  
Connor swallowed. He knew his boyfriends wouldn't judge him for thinking of something like that, but it was still so hard to say. He was still afraid of their reactions. He took a breath, gripping Kevin's hand. "Um." his voice was high with embarrassment. "I was thinking....."

  
Kevin gave him a sympathetic smile, encouraging him to continue.

  
"We should have sex." he blurted out.

  
Cunningham gasped, causing McKinley to flinch.

  
Price's eyes widened. "Really?" he asked softly.

  
McKinley nodded, burning with shame.

  
But instead of being repulsed or even weirded out, the look on Kevin's face was something else entirely. He looked.... inspired? His eyes were ablaze with some sort of new-found determination.

  
"K-Kevin...?" McKinley asked tentatively.

  
"Yes." was all he said.

  
"Y-'yes'?"

  
"Sorry, I meant _hell_ yes."

  
"I don't understand..."

  
"Let's do it."

  
"N-now?" McKinley asked, confused.

  
"Right now."

  
Cunningham looked pretty excited about this new thing as well, but not quite as crazy as Price.

  
"Really?" Suddenly McKinley was more bewildered than embarrassed. He'd suggested having sex and his boyfriends had turned crazy. "You look... really determined.. It's scaring me a little... Are you really sure?"

  
"Connor, come on, it was your suggestion, wasn't it?" Price gently placed McKinley's hands on his body. "Don't you want to?"

  
This was almost too much. Who would've guessed that Kevin could be so sexy. His voice... and his eyes.. He gave Connor this look that sent shivers up his spine.

  
Connor looked nervously over at Arnold, who beamed excitedly.

  
"Me too?" he asked. "How does it work with three people??"

  
"I have an idea, but I'm not too sure either." Kevin admitted. "Will you teach us?" he looked back up at Connor, who blushed bright red.

  
"Please?" Arnold asked softly, interlocking his fingers with Connor's. "We want to."

 

Price placed a tender kiss on McKinley's cheek.

  
McKinley was nervous. Both his boyfriends were counting on him now. He was so relieved by their acceptance, but he still couldn't relax. His boyfriends didn't know what to do; He had to be in control. He'd always imagined himself on the bottom (or in this case, the middle?) but he couldn't let them down. He felt sort of giddy to be about to do this. He was cursed with horrible nightmares every time he'd imagined it; he couldn't even dream of doing it with one missionary, let alone _two_.

  
He felt excited, but suddenly he wasn't sure where to start. He'd never really thought of topping before. Bottoming seemed much more comfy. He figured that the top's goal is to keep the bottom(s?) comfy and make sure they feel good. He quickly decided what to do.

  
Returning the kiss, he gently swapped places with Price, pressing him between himself and Cunningham.

  
He seemed slightly surprised at first, but didn't protest as McKinley began unbuttoning his shirt.  
Cunningham went along with it, pulling off Price's shirt.

  
McKinley pushed his hand up his undershirt, illicting a soft 'mmm' from the brunet.

  
"...Connor?" Arnold asked.

  
"Yeah?"

  
"What do I do?"

  
Kevin was also looking at him expectantly.

  
His boyfriends really were clueless. He supposed he would just have to teach them. "Just.... follow my lead."

  
"Ah! Oh...."

  
"Connor...!"

  
\-----

  
"Elder McKinley?" Elder Church called, knocking on the door again. He'd been standing outside of Price and Cunningham's room for nearly 10 minutes, with no answer. "Oh, what are they doing in there?" he sighed, turning away from the door.

  
"Did you try putting your ear against the door and listening? You might be able to hear what they're up to." Schrader suggested.

  
Church shrugged, doing just that. He couldn't hear much, but the sound of... strained breathing? Then a sound... of furniture scraping across the floor. "Rearranging the room...?" he whispered. "But why?”

  
Neeley frowned. "That doesn't make any sense. Here, Elder, let me listen." he stepped forward, leaning gently against the door. He made a confused face. "I hear panting and... is that Elder Price whining?"

  
"Ooh, maybe they're working out!" Poptarts chimed in. "Elder Cunningham said something about wanting to, didn't he?"

  
Church nodded, still looking a bit unconvinced. He shot a glance over at Davis.

  
"Here, let me listen." Poptarts put his ear against the door.

  
"O, God!" came Price's voice.

  
"Gosh, f-forgive me, ooh..." Was that McKinley?

  
"Holy Christ-" Cunningham?

  
Poptarts felt confused all of a sudden. "Are they confessing their sins?" he asked skeptically. He had no idea.

  
Zelder made a face. "What kind of stuff were they saying?"

  
"Listen for yourself."

  
Zelder pressed his ear to the door, and his face paled. "I don't think they're atoning for sins. If anything they're _committing_ sins." he swallowed, moving away from the door.

  
"What do you mean?" Poptarts asked, bewildered.

  
"Elder Davis, how about you listen."

  
They all moved out of the way so that Davis could press his ear against the wooden door. After merely a few seconds, the Elder's face turned beet red. He quickly removed himself from the door.

  
"Uhm, guys...?" he started, completely embarrassed. "I-I think Zelder is right.... I don't think they're doing any of those things..."

  
"What do you mean?" Neeley asked.

  
"I'm pretty sure this is like... Gosh... Y-you know how Elder McKinley told us about 'the Steve thing'?"

  
"With the deserted island?" Poptarts' eyes widened.

  
"Swimming naked in the-" Michaels gasped. They all fell pale-faced, completely speechless.

  
After a period of silence, a horrified Neeley whispered. "But there's three of them...."

  
There was a collective gasp as the Elders all tried to process this.

  
"How does that even work?"

  
They slumped down on the floor, in absolute shock.

  
"I mean, I knew McKinley was gay, but..." Davis lamented, voice barely reaching a whisper. “Price and Cunningham, too?”

  
"Now we're all thinking about it, too, oh god, oh god." Schrader panicked. "What do we do?"

  
"What are we gonna do when they come out of there?" Church asked frantically. "We won't be able to just act normally after knowing about this!"

  
"But we can't tell them either!" Davis shrieked. He didn't want to think about his friends doing that! And now he would be forced to. The thought of the threesome finding out the others had been spying on them was almost sickening. It was a total invasion of their privacy; Friends didn't do that to each other.

  
"The church of Arnold permits homosexuality, but still, this seems a little..." Neeley whispered, devastated.

  
They all sat in silence, occasionally cringing as any stray noises could be heard through the wood of the door.

  
"We can't just sit here and listen to this! It's totally obscene!" Schrader protested after a particularly loud Elder McKinley moan was heard.

  
"You're right, Elder." Zelder agreed. "But what can we do?"

  
"L-let's all go outside and just calm down." Church suggested.

  
\----

  
The 7 of them retreated to just outside the missionary building. Neeley closed the door behind them and sunk down against it, sighing in relief.

  
They all huddled up, trying to figure out what to do. "We can't be weird about it," Schrader said. "They'll know that we know."

  
"How are we supposed to act normal around them after knowing about this?? They're definitely gonna know we know!" Davis panicked.

  
"We just need to calm down." Michaels sucked in a shaky breath. "Just take deep breaths and don't think about it. We have to stop thinking about it."

  
"It's hard to stop thinking about it... It's haunting me." Poptarts stared blankly at the wall. "Three of them... How does it work with three of them-"

  
"Shut up, Poptarts, we're supposed to stop thinking about it!"

  
"Yeah, dude! Elder McKinley always tells us to turn it off, remember?"

  
"It doesn't seem like he did a very good job of turning it off."

  
"Oh, stop it-"

  
"Guys!!" Neeley protested. "Cut it out."

  
"Yeah, why don't we just go for a nice walk and leave this alone, okay?" Church suggested, calming himself with a deep breath. "We'll forget about it in no time."

  
Somehow, none of them believed that.

  
\----

  
When the distraught Elders of District Nine returned, they found what could be considered even worse than what they had witnessed earlier.

  
McKinley, Price, and Cunningham were all cooking dinner together. Their behaviour would not have been noticeably different if the poor Elders didn't know what they had found out earlier, but now that they did, it was ridiculous. They were so domestic it was almost gross.

  
As they all sat together at the table, the romantic, loving looks the triad exchanged did not go unnoticed by any of the other boys. They all tried to ignore it, but now that they knew, it was plain as day.

  
McKinley, taking notice of their silence, spoke up, brow furrowed suspiciously. "What's gotten into all of you?"

  
"Nothing..." Davis said nonchalantly.

  
"Yeah! We're just.. hungry, that's all." Neeley covered.

  
"But you've barely even touched your food." McKinley said skeptically. They all fell quiet again, save for the scraping of forks as they all poked at their dinner.

 

It was Poptarts who snapped first.

  
After Cunningham and Price shared a particularly cheesy moment as their hands brushed passing the salt to each other across the table, the latter's eyes twinkling and full of love, Poptarts had had enough.

  
"THAT IS IT!" he screamed, his chair scraping against the floor as he stood. "I've had enough of you three!"

  
"Us three?" McKinley asked, giving him a sceptical look.

  
"What's the matter, Poptarts?" Price asked, bewildered.

  
"You are! All three of you!” he growled. “I know what you did."

  
"Whoa, whoa, Elder Poptarts," Davis stopped him, grabbing his sleeve. "Let's be civil, shall we?"

  
A look of panic flooded McKinley's face. He knew what Poptarts was most likely talking about, and was a little terrified of being proved right.

  
"What are you talking about?" Price asked. The worried look on his face implied that he already had a pretty good idea of what it was.

  
"You guys were-"

  
"Elder Poptarts! Stop it, we're supposed to be acting normal, remember?." Michaels whispered frantically.

  
"I can't stand it! It's so obvious now!"

  
"What's obvious?" McKinley asked.

  
"That you guys had- you did- you were-"

  
"Poptarts." Davis warned through gritted teeth.

  
"You guys fucked!" he blurted out.

  
"We did WHAT?" Cunningham sputtered, embarrassed.

  
"Language, Poptarts!" Michaels scolded.

 

"W-what would make you think that?" McKinley stammered, ashamed.

 

"We could hear you!"

 

"N-n-no, you're wrong! W-we weren't-!" McKinley protested, his burning face giving him away. "We-"

  
"Give it up, you two." Price sighed, red-faced and refusing to make eye contact with Poptarts.

  
"But K-Kevin, why-"

  
"There's no use trying to hide it if they already know. Latter Day Saints don't lie, remember?"

  
Poptarts was surprised that he had admitted it. But now a new confusion lingered amongst the 7 of them. If they really had done that, were they...?

  
Church voiced it. "What's going on between you three, anyways?"

  
McKinley looked up at him, blushing. "We're, like, uhm,"

  
"We're dating." Price mumbled.

  
"Three people can date?"

  
He shrugged. "Any number of people can date."

  
Church looked confused. "But how?"

  
"Well, just like with two people I guess?"

  
"But it's not the same."

  
"I think I get it." Zelder said. "It's just like with a couple, but with one extra person."

  
"Don't say extra." Price corrected. "All three people are of equal importance."

  
"Okay, okay," Neeley interrupted. "But how does _that_ work with three people?"

  
McKinley wanted to die. "N-none of your business!" he stammered before either of his boyfriends could even _think_ about answering that.

  
"Come on, Elder McKinley."  


“No!”

 

“Come on, please?”

 

"Why do you even want to know!?"

  
"We're curious!" Poptarts whined.

  
"I am _not_ going to tell you!"

  
"Please?"

  
"No!"

 

**Author's Note:**

> ao3's spacing can eat an entire ass


End file.
